Adversity Makes Us Better

posted on: March 15, 2019
author: Brian Lomax, Ed.D.

One of the great paradoxes of striving for improvement and mastery is that we expend a lot of energy avoiding situations that will make us better. We avoid adversity. We avoid obstacles. We avoid challenges. But the reality is that all of these things are normal. Adversity is normal. Challenges are normal. Trying to avoid these things is irrational and sometimes counter-productive toward achieving our goals. Challenges and adversity afford us many opportunities to make ourselves better, but we often don’t take advantage of them.

“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” – Knute Rockne (1888 – 1931), University of Notre Dame Football Coach

To be clear, challenges do make us better. For example, if you are competing against a difficult opponent or performing at a higher level of competition, your skills will be tested. You will be forced to stretch your skills in order to meet the challenge. Win or lose, the experience will make you better. You will learn. You will take what you learned and apply it. And then you will learn some more. Rising to the challenge is the answer. Shrinking from it will lead to stagnation.

Another example of adversity would be when an official or an opponent makes a bad call.  Our typical reaction is to get upset, but that’s a waste of energy and it won’t help us win.  The call won’t change.  Unfortunately, bad calls are a part of sports, and we have to learn to play through them while remaining focused on performing well and trying to win.  You’ll be a better player if you can accept this bit of adversity and grow from it.

As an athlete and competitor, you have to decide how important it is to you to become a master of what you do. This determination will become the basis of your decision making process when adversity appears. I suggest that you make mastery your top priority, at least with respect to how you think about your sport. Let your pursuit of mastery drive your daily decisions. Let it drive how you respond to the inevitable challenges that athletes face. If mastery is your goal and you face some adversity in practice or competition, it will be easier to rise to the occasion because you know it will make you better. Embrace challenges; don’t avoid them. Become a master.

“Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” -Confucius (551 – 479 BC)

The mindset of “adversity makes us better” is crucial to the growth of an athlete. It is a rational and healthy perspective. It helps you handle the inevitable challenges of life better. However, it’s not easy to adopt this mindset. It’s not easy to play through adversity. But it’s important to realize that the path to improvement does not lie in avoiding obstacles. As Marcus Aurelius said, “The obstacle is the way.” You must go through obstacles to become the best you can become. Mastery awaits the person who can learn to view obstacles as opportunities.